Bad Pick-Up Lines

"Hey baby, hurry up and write down your phone number before I don't want it anymore."

"No wonder the sky is gray today, all the blue is in your eyes."

"If I told you that you have a great body would you hold it against me?

"Whoa, I thought I had ALREADY met the most beautiful girl in this place!

"I know milk does a body good, but have you been overdosing?"

"Hey Baby, You have calves that would make any cow jealous."

"As long as you are here, would you mind helping me burp the air out of my water bed?"

"How do you want your eggs in the morning? How about fertilized?"

"I'm sorry, I'm new in town...Could you please give me directions to your place?"

"Do you believe in Love at first sight or do I have to walk by again?"

"Got a name? Or shall I call you mine?"

Little Johnny's Psych Lesson

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!"

After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up.

The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?"

"No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

Shrink Joke

The psychiatrist's secretary walks into his study and says, "That old patient, Jack, is in the waiting room asking to see you again. This time he claims he's invisible."

The psychiatrist responds, "Tell him I can't see him."