Memories

Three guys are debating who has the best memory and how far back it

goes.

First guy says, "I can remember the first day of my First Grade class."

Second guy says, "I can remember my first day at Nursery School."

Not to be outdone, the third guy says, "Hell, that's nothing. I can

remember going to the senior prom with my father, and coming home with

my mother."

The Deli

Moshe, the owner of a small Kosher New York deli, was being questioned by an IRS agent about his tax return. He had reported a net profit of $80,000 for the year.

'Why don't you people leave me alone?' the deli owner said. 'I work like a dog, everyone in my family helps out, the place is only closed three days a year. And you want to know how I made $80,000?'

'It's not your income that bothers us,' the agent said. 'It's these travel deductions. You listed ten trips to Israel for you and your wife.'

'Oh, that?' the owner said smiling. 'Well... We also deliver.'