On Trial

The judge says to a double-homicide defendant, "You're charged with

beating your wife to death with a hammer."

A voice at the back of the courtroom yells out, "You bastard."

The judge says, "You're also charged with beating your mother-in-law

to death with a hammer."

The voice in the back of the courtroom yells out, "You damned bastard."

The judge stops and says to the guy in the back of the courtroom,

"Sir, I can understand your anger and frustration at this crime.

But no more outbursts from you, or I'll charge you with contempt. Is

that a problem?"

The guy in the back of the court stands up and says, "For fifteen

years, I've lived next door to that bastard, and every time I asked

to borrow a hammer, he said he didn't have one."